LeTTinG Go...~

I get a few emails talking about the broken relationship and thanks for your questions.To me,whatever the situation it is you still have to respect the decision and let go the dumper.I know it's hurts,but just think..what made you so eager wants them at first place?Same goes to the dumper,what made you so eager wants the dumpee at first place?There's must be a good lesson the dumper left for you isn't?Tipu kalau aku kata aku tak rindu dia☹️,dia ada jugak baiknya..Dia baik kat people surrounding dia,the elders..even not to me and my parents.Pada parents aku dia mmg baik,someone yang boleh ubah aku (even just kenal nama and muka)....but idk, bila teringat dia..rasa mcm ada high volt strucked,jadi trauma, night mare,can't sleep,asyik recall the pain were left.Every time aku teringat dia, I'm jst able to istighfar and aku simpan dia dalam hati aku yg hancur💔 together with Al-Fatihah..even dia hurts aku,dia ajar aku byk benda.Dia ajar aku to be independent,not easy been bullied (even it's turns to dia yg bully aku...suatu kesakitan yg takde ampun sakitnya☹️).Dulu aku tak ngam dgn one of my sister-in-law,but dia ajar aku utk terima dia and bagi dia masa utk dia adapt living together with us.Alhamdulillah,it's works.We can co-operate and get along very well😊Thats why aku rasa aku tak berat hati utk "tinggalkan" parents aku cz i knew I'm leaving them in a good hand.Both of my sister-in-law can look after my parents for me.The other thing yang dia ajar aku is about my expenditure, manage my cash flow wisely,the essential of insurance, don't spend on things that unnecessary,don't simply lend money to others and many more.Mostly everyday dia akan tanya khabar aku..wether i'm doing well,what is my itinerary,my plan,my work,my activities and so on.Dia quite secretive about sharing problem even i did asked but dia always dengar semua problem aku and apa yang aku nak share..cerita and always said "i kan ada ️🤗".Dia selalu jugak jadi my punching bag cz all the matters is solely and mostly bcz of dia.. literally cz of the sense of insecured....Cz aku dah sense yg dia akan aniaya aku and.. ulang2 kali aku tanya dia..and dia denied...and ulang2 kali aku tanya dia do you really love me???he said yes he do loves me.....Sbb tu bila dia dah takde aku rasa kind of big lost😣,rasa kosong,sunyi and at the same time i felt hurts and dissapointed as well cz my parents raised me up very well and protect me from getting hurt but you did hurts me to the core.Aku dah terbiasa tunggu dia pergi and blk dari kerja even seawal pagi mana dia going to work or selewat mana dia back from work,aku tetap tunggu dia to make sure dia safe and sound☹️Aku dah terbiasa ada dia for several years...bila suddenly dia takde......aku rasa my other half were gone too...happy belated birthday dear myself,i really missed the old of me😢I wanna let go this blog eventually cz its means nothing now to me..but this is one of my source of income as well..hmmm..looks alike I've to stick with it even my first love already "gone" anyways but its remain in my heart🤗...and I'd witnessed all the chronology.I let it go but I'm not interested in having relationship cz i don't dare to gets hurts and humiliated again,once bite twice shy.The damages were too severe and it's enough.One thing for sure ibadat and faith aku remain still the same with or without dia....

EnOuGH iS eNoUgH~

We organized a charity fund raising for the needy since I'm still in my MC leave and I've to occupied my time with something else that keeps me busy but still...i have my own distance with social media.I can be proud of myself that I never upload anything that triggered public to dig into my story or teased anyone but...at beggining yeah maybe i did post it unintentionally,that can't be undo haha😊As for the charity event..it's was such a very successful event in one of my favorite city.Thanks to those who took part in it😊i felt extremely tired and turn in before midnight.I wake up in the middle of night and talked to Him,our Creator... asked Him to give me a full strength in order to live well and to be "well" again cz TBH at some point I'm very fragile😐.Soon after that i fall asleep and "he" appeared in my dream.I wake up and felt my heart aches,not a chest tight but literally hurts☹️ When i was wandering around in the airport,I'm kinda feel "his presence",that's maybe becz "he" suddenly came across to my mind.I walked forth slowly till to the main way to the tunnel, observed surrounding me.Hes nowhere seen😁Then i step backward and continue wandering around again and no longer wondering about him.I'm safely landed in my homeland and he appeared again last night in my dream and again...my heart aches ☹️ When i talked to Him last night,i plead to Allah don't "brought" him in my dream anymore if that's only leads pain in me.I never hates him even he did owe an apology to my parents..Yessss,he owe an apology to my parents!!!but i don't wished to "see" him in my dream either,it's hurts😢That's why sometimes i choosed not to sleep in order to "avoid" him and his presence in my dreams.Then,this morning my twin texted me and said "hey,i seems saw him yesterday, that's him?He's wandering around with a little boy" Then i said "i have no idea..and to be exact he is my ex now and no longer relates with me😏 shes just keep her her mouth mum and shut,no further conversation haha😆.Means "his presence" was true and i just hits the nail🔨 if that's was really him cz i only had one and only ex in my life time🏹🔨

SiMpLe RuLeS~

Well I'm just thinking of to have a break in my "writing"as i need an ample rest but since there's a lots of simmilar questions about love through my mail😩.I haven't married but I'll try my best to share some thoughts and logically thinking😊So,I'm decided to give it an update here😊Ladies,I'm exactly like you before...i lived...loved.. dumped and hurts by someone i loved and it's not easy for you to hate someone you loved for long..but it's okay,its shows HE loves you by giving you such a huge obstacles for you to move on forward in your life and you learnt about being patient.Take it as your life lesson even it's hurts,no matter what religion and belief you are,you have to remember karma and kifarah is real😊 You can't force people to stay by your side,save your pride with those cheap tactics.I know you missed him,but keep him in your heart babe😐 Thus,find a man with brain and ball rather than a man without both or just solely one of it or just a dick😉One more thing be and independent and career women that won't hunger for a dick and money.Fork out money by your own,make your own living and don't be a sickening dick hunter that made your totally reliance on man is severe instead of being independent.🤪C'mon ladies,be independent.You don't have to show or let other know your sorrow ,but show it and talk to Him,HE will show you the way.Trust me,you are gonna be alright honey.Be patient,be professional and be somebody with beauty,brain and behavior instead of brainless cz the way you present yourself was a self reflection of your genuine attitude 😊.You don't have to draw attention to others with your neverending story cz it makes you no different from a real looser 😊I saw one quote,it's hurtful tho..says.."Only the real loser will bark day and night like a mad dog to draw attention,it's pathetic tho" OMG,i was like kinda...hmm there should be a proper and better word than that to describe instead of dog??🤪Human is still a human😊I said my piece,the choice is still on your conscience after all.Feel free to approach me if you needs someone to share your thoughts,I'm here to listen.Thanks😊